Obituaries

Nham Tran余府陳吟梅夫人
B: 1930-01-10
D: 2018-12-07
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Tran余府陳吟梅夫人, Nham
Shou Mo莫寿敖先生
B: 1940-05-25
D: 2018-12-06
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Mo莫寿敖先生, Shou
Seang Chan 曾国祥先生
B: 1935-01-14
D: 2018-12-01
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Chan 曾国祥先生, Seang
Tieu Au 區肖慈夫人
B: 1952-05-13
D: 2018-11-25
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Au 區肖慈夫人, Tieu
Jiao Wang 蕭府王娇英夫人
B: 1935-05-14
D: 2018-11-18
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Wang 蕭府王娇英夫人, Jiao
Kai Wong黄啟安先生
B: 1957-04-06
D: 2018-11-11
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Wong黄啟安先生, Kai
Kit Law 羅傑歡先生
B: 1925-02-25
D: 2018-11-03
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Law 羅傑歡先生, Kit
Yuanjie Ye 叶元杰先生
B: 1950-11-20
D: 2018-11-03
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Ye 叶元杰先生, Yuanjie
Kenny Dai 戴健利先生
B: 1948-01-27
D: 2018-10-25
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Dai 戴健利先生, Kenny
Mui Van 吳府溫二妹夫人
B: 1936-06-05
D: 2018-10-22
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Van 吳府溫二妹夫人, Mui
Pogman Lai 黎博文先生
B: 1934-03-12
D: 2018-10-22
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Lai 黎博文先生, Pogman
Rong Chang 張荣国先生
B: 1920-04-01
D: 2018-10-19
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Chang 張荣国先生, Rong
Wang Chan陳华勳先生
B: 1957-08-02
D: 2018-10-17
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Chan陳华勳先生, Wang
JIncheng Li 李金成先生
B: 1981-08-02
D: 2018-10-14
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Li 李金成先生, JIncheng
Yok Leung 李府梁若薇夫人
B: 1931-07-17
D: 2018-10-08
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Leung 李府梁若薇夫人, Yok
Ying Liu 陳府刘颖瑜夫人
B: 1958-03-07
D: 2018-10-05
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Liu 陳府刘颖瑜夫人, Ying
Wu Huang 黄武洪先生
B: 1941-06-06
D: 2018-10-04
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Huang 黄武洪先生, Wu
Binh Du 何府刘鳳萍夫人
B: 1951-08-18
D: 2018-09-28
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Du 何府刘鳳萍夫人, Binh
Degui Li 李德桂先生
B: 1946-06-20
D: 2018-09-28
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Li 李德桂先生, Degui
Jun Huang 黄均先生
B: 1933-08-16
D: 2018-09-27
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Huang 黄均先生, Jun
Chang Ye 周府葉長嬌夫人
B: 1921-10-19
D: 2018-09-23
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Ye 周府葉長嬌夫人, Chang

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Funeral Etiquette

Also known as social graces, the rules of etiquette ease us through challenging social situations. Most of us know how to behave in common circumstances but unless you've been to a lot of funerals, you may not know the rules of proper behavior in this often uncomfortable social situation.

The Basics of Funeral Etiquette

Emily Post once said, "Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others." Much of what we know today about etiquette comes from this woman, who published her first book of etiquette in 1922. When you use those words as your guide, the rules of funeral etiquette become easier to understand.

What to Wear

Tradition has always required a certain level of formality in dressing for a funeral. However, today's end-of-life services are so varied – ranging from the traditional funeral to the often more relaxed celebration-of-life – that it's challenging to know exactly what's expected of you.

The advisors on the Emily Post website tell readers that "attire isn't limited to just black or dark gray. Remember, though, that it is a serious occasion and your attire should reflect that, especially if you are participating in the service. At the very least it should be clean, neat, and pressed as for any other important occasion."

What to Say

No one expects you to say more than a few words and bereaved family members are often unable to give you their full attention anyway. So, keep it short and make it sincere.

"I'm so very sorry for your loss" may work very well. If you have time to add to those seven words, you might want to share a personal story about a time you shared with the deceased. But, watch closely for signs that your audience needs to move on to receive condolences from other funeral guests.

When speaking to other funeral guests, speak quietly. This is not a time to discuss business or share stories about your recent vacation. Instead, focus on sharing and listening to stories of times spent with the deceased.

What to Do

If you're unsure about what actions to take when being led by a pastor or celebrant, simply follow along. If you're not comfortable, don't draw attention to your unwillingness to participate. Be discrete and respectful of others.

Always leave your cell phone in the car or at the very least, turn it to vibrate mode or turn it off.

How to Handle the Visitation

A visitation, or viewing, is a time prior to the funeral where guests are invited to view the casketed body of the deceased. While it is customary to show your respects to the deceased by stepping up to the casket, you may not feel comfortable doing so. That's perfectly alright; no one wants you to be unnerved by the experience, so focus your attention instead on providing comfort to the bereaved family.

After the Funeral

If the deceased is to be buried following the service, the funeral officiant will announce the location of the interment. If the cemetery is not located on the grounds of the funeral home, there will be a processional of cars formed to escort the hearse to the cemetery. Unless they have chosen to have a private burial, those in attendance are welcome to join in the procession however, don't feel obligated to do so. You may simply leave the funeral at that time.

The Funeral Reception

Many families today hold a post-funeral gathering where food and refreshments are served. While this is a time to share memories, laughter, and even tears, your behavior at a funeral reception needs to remain respectful. 

Follow-up with Kindness

If you've not already done so, this is a good time to send the family a sympathy note or card. About a week after the funeral, pick up the phone to check in with them to see if there's anything they need.

"Good manners," wrote Emily Post, "reflect something from inside – an innate sense of consideration for others and respect for self." We think that just about sums it up; no matter the situation – wedding, baptism, dinner party or cocktails with friends – her observations about good manners (when followed) will serve us all well.

Sources:
www.emilypost.com